5/02/09

I had paid for the Marriott for this night several weeks previously. I wanted their morning buffet on my birthday, and I found the Marriott to be one of most peaceful places in Pattaya.

On the other hand I had been sick for the last couple of weeks and today I could not stop sweating and the continuous fatigue was continuing. Still I wasn't going to have wasted that much money, so we dressed me up, mopped me up, packed a very small bag crawled out the door into the hot noon day sun - that was mercifully breezy - and fell into a baht bus, getting off at the Marriott.

I had been very specific in my booking: king bed, non-smoking, pool side, ground floor. It seemed they were having difficulty prying the previous occupant of that room out. We could check in now if we wanted a single bed, smoking on the 12th floor. Or we could wait until the problem was solved and room readied. About two hours, they informed us. I opted to wait.

Like many of the couches in public places, each in their own way, the design of the ones in the lobby are quite strange. By this I mean that they do mot appear to be made for use by human beings. In this case, the seats were about four feet deep. So you could sit all the way with your legs completely on the cushioning, or you could sit normal and then lean back like a bed. This is the method I opted for.

So there I lay prostate, sweating profusely and looking to those looking like the latest swine flue victim. I'm my mind I figured maybe this would speed them up a bit. Two hours Thai time can be a long time. But I didn't have the strength to go do anything.

It took three and half hours to get our room - last one before the courtyard. They offered us late check out as a cancellation prize.

Identical if not better to the room we had last time however I had changed. The wonderful comforter I had loved so much last time pushed down uncomfortably on my much weakened frame.

Mai went to run some errands and arrived back too late for us to use the swimming pool. While it was something I had wanted to do I doubt I would have made it happen even if she made it back on time.

I used the oversized tub instead and took a very hot bath that was probably very good for me.

5/03/09

My cell phone rang at 3:30am. It was my sister calling because my mother's email was broken and mom was worried about me (it seems very strange to worried about me. What's the worse that can happen? Exactly what we are prepared for.)

After that I dozed and reawoke in half hour cycles finally giving up watching TV at 6. I got to catch Obama's GM speech "I stand firmly behind the unions,... and the workers... and the corporation." The man has gift for taking more sides of an issue than most people are even aware exist, without getting called on it. The ultimate TV president.

We went to the buffet, but neither my appetite or my taste buds were back in fighting form yet. The carrot juice was very good, and I had several glasses of that, but otherwise I just picked bits here and there.

Back at the room I watched news channels unavailable back at the condo and tried to find comfortable positions. A little after noon we received a call from the front desk asking why we had not checked out yet. Our assertion that we did not have to check out until three due to being forced to spend 3 and 1/2 hours sweating in their lobby, wilted in the face of their logic that no such event could possibly occur in this hotel. I pictured another couple waiting for our room and yesterday started to make more sense. I decided I'd rather be home than fight it.

Having forgotten a few things just as we closed the door, we discovered our key had already been deactivated. Then after we got them to open the door and got what we forgot, I realized at check out that I had forgotten my Lantus in the fridge.

Finally freed, we hired a baht bus to take us home where I collapsed.

5/05/09

I woke up to realize that my birthday present had arrived. The first thing I was aware of was that I had none of my headaches. I can remember a day in Florida being ecstatic to have a day with one headache and then I couldn't remember when that had happened last back then. Now my head was pain free and clear.

Then I stood up and there was no balance adjustment period. Reality was spot on. That actually took a little adjusting too. It wasn't until I realized I was pain free all over my body that I began to get suspicious. I think my body was pumping out pain killers or blockers.

I was feeling no signs of the illnesses of the last few weeks either. No fatigue! And while my mind was not back to full power it was heads above the molasses of late.

So did I go out and enjoy myself or do what needed doing to wrap everything up?

It was a close call, but obligation won over adding more experiences that I don't believe I'll retain after death.

Much like Christians all torn up that their child has gone on to a better place, I feel at odds with my beliefs. I know it is pointless to want to accumulate experiences that I will lose in two weeks, yet the pull to do so is there.

 

5/07/09

Loose ends:

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I said to my Mother on the phone yesterday, that I sure hoped that we didn't come round again as I hadn't learned anything this lifetime.

She went on to point out where I was a positive influence.

I couldn't get the point across at the time. Certainly I have had some good effects, I've had some damned destructive effects to, and I have learned a lot - I'm definitely not the same person I was in my teens or my thirties. But what I was trying to say, the core, from the point of view of an evolving being, has not improved and might even have devolved. I still procrastinate, I will still almost always choose the easiest path. Despite this last year, I am still more of a observer than a participant in life. And all things being even I'll still choose a convenient lie over a complicated truth.

This is not the path to happiness, yet I doubt I would be any different if I got to do it all again. When I'm done, I'd like to be done.

•••

I check out of this condo on the 13th. Mai and I will go our separate ways (both for legal and emotional reasons) at that time. That means there will be one last posting on the morning of the 13th. I'll try to think of some nice pithy wrap up for this journey.

5/12/09

All the pictures taken since I left the States have been put on a DVD. The vast bulk of the pictures are not labeled in any meaningful way and can only be guessed at by names of the folders. I will mail it Mary K tomorrow. Any one wishing a copy contact Mary K.

Family is huge part of the Thai culture, Mai could use being included in ours. Her email is: samai_thai@yahoo.com.

 

5/13/09

I spent the bulk of yesterday making phone calls back in the States. Then Mai and I decided to go, after an utter lack of enthusiasm for most regions of food, to Tequila Reef. I wanted the beanless chili. Mai wanted the chips. We added guacamole and Pad Thai (all restaurants serve Thai food) and a pitcher of Margaritas.

The food barely got touched and we were oddly full. It made the alcohol all the more powerful.

Being inches from the beach, we thought a walk might help us feel better. After a bit iof that we grab a Baht bus to Walking Street and played gawking tourist until we began to sober up a little. We grabbed the first cab that offered, and back to the condo we were taken.

We attempted to watch Scanners 3 but it did not hold our attention and Mai who had been such a brave little soldier all day, lost it and cried for several hours. I think real sleep came around dawn.

About 10:30 Mary K called on my cell phone (this is what I get for giving out my number) saying my sister was wondering why I hadn't called. At first I was inwardly miffed at being woke up, but shortly after the call was over I realized that I needed to get up and get a move on.

A phone call to my sister later, and some frenzied prepacking later, I realized that we weren't possibly going to get out of here today. Mai called the front desk to ask/inform them that we would not be gone until tomorrow. I don't know if that shoves everything off one day or if the 17th still holds.

But it does allow me to relax and get everything done at a reasonable pace.

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